Updated: Apr 24, 2020
Yes, and... A dōjō Practice with Loraine Bjorendahl .
Kids have their own ways to communicate their emotions. Oftentimes, more direct, more raw, and perhaps more honest than we adults. We have come to learn that growing up means negotiating daily between what we can say and what we want to say. We parents also know that kids speak 1,000 languages, and it is up to us parents to identify which language is our kid using right now: Energy, fantasy, imitation, or playfulness. Loraine Bjorendahl shares a great insight with us: whatever the language our kids need us to speak, a good initial step might be to accept what is given to us, or what she borrows from the art if improv: Yes and...
“During these uncertain times, kids pick up on the energy around them. They are also perhaps more cooped up with less of their usual ways of discharging energy or connecting- like sports or physical play and in-person connection with friends. At the same time, parents are dealing with our own practical tasks, uncertainties, work pressures, and more. One effective way through is to playfully experiment- to improvise.”
But what if leaning into our kid's energy (or languages) means more chaos and more noise?
Press the Pause Button
“Take a pause, even just a few seconds delay, before responding to your child or situation to give yourself love, to recognize what’s happening, to see the good or legitimate need in your kids, to accept that that is how it is at this moment. Perhaps you can step out and take a pause, perhaps it’s just a couple of breaths before you respond, but it matters. It can make it a whole lot easier to say Yes to what is happening and get creative with it.
"Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom” -Viktor E. Frankl”
Thank you, Loraine!
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